132 lines
9.1 KiB
Plaintext
132 lines
9.1 KiB
Plaintext
* The DeLorian *
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-----------------------------------
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Captain's Log: Stardate 0000 0002
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Clone Code: 0
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-----------------------------------
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Once Me, Myself, and I embarked out to our journey we ran into an issue very
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quickly. With there being three of us who were (as far as I can tell) all the
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same person, we ran into the communication issue of what to call each other.
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After some discussion, we came to the agreement that I would be "Captain", the
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version of me that was created from the universe where the coin landed on heads
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would be "Heads", and of course for the same reason the other would be "Tails".
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After that was agreed we decided to take inventory of what we have to work with
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within Boaty McBoatface while we wait for the autopilot to take us to the
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rendevous point with the client. Heads and Tails went to search opposite ends of
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the ship, but I decided I might try to make use of my new time device (which
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according to The Elder is called the "Deus Ex Machina") to save myself some time
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(ha, get it?) by trying to find some more exploits like the coin trick that
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created Heads and Tails. I set a checkpoint and decided that I would go search
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the ship, and after doing so I would return to that checkpoint and give myself
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the report so that I don't need to do all of the work! With the checkpoint set
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I immediately received a tap on the shoulder to find a slightly exhaused version
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of myself standing behind me. They informed me they were going to go take a nap
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since they have completed taking inventory and left towards what I can only
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assume the location of the sleeping quarters were at. A bit miffed that my plan
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backfired I asked them why they would not simply tell me what they found so I
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could skip the boring chore. They informed me that when they were me they were
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not told anything either and their future version simply left to go take a nap
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as well, so if they did not get to skip doing the work than neither do I. With
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that, they completed their journey out of the room and left me alone again. The
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nerve, I cannot believe I would be such a jerk to myself! ...Well, on second
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thought, this is not too shocking. My first experience meeting my time clone was
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being punched in the face by them. At least when I am done with this I can a nap
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and get back at myself by making the previous version of myself do all this work
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too. That will surely teach myself a lesson from being so stubborn.
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After going back in time to enjoy my nap I decided to go look for Heads and
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Tails since they should be finishing up with their search of the ship by then.
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Finding Heads was easy enough since they were on their way back, so we decided
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to head out together to find Tails. We each took notes in our respective copies
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of the book we received from The Elder, so I just copied down Heads's notes into
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mine and then swapped so they could do the same. By the time that was done we
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found Tails, but also a lot more. Apparently I was not the only one who decided
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to try more time shenanigans since we stumbled upon a large crowd of time clones
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all arguing with each other. After it was clear from watching the chaos unfold
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for a few moments, I decided that since I am the captain of Boaty McBoatface it
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was my job to try and get to the bottom of what happened here and try to restore
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order. With a sustained, high-pitched whistle I drew the attention of the Tails
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clones and requested for the audience of the original Tails. This seemed to
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trigger the same arguing from before so I let forth the same whistle again and
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this time just grabbed the closest one and asked them to explain what is going
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on here. Apparently Tails discovered that we have a weapons system aboard the
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ship, but not enough crew to make effective usage of it. So, the logical
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conclusion was to create perform the same experiment that created the initial
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clones a few times. However, since I forgot how quickly exponential growth can
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get out of hand, this very quickly created way too many time clones. It was
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suggested that we can fix the problem by ejecting the extras into space, but
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that meant that there needed to be some sort of system to determine who would be
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getting ejected. Since no one wanted to volunteer another suggested that they
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could flip coins to decide, but the others disagreed since that is what
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originally got them into this mess. The last suggestion of removing the clones
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in order who who was created last and working backwards is what triggered the
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fighting since the newer clones found this unfair since this system was not
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agreed upon before their creation, as well as the older clones had no way to
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determine who was the newest clones and none of them wanted to identify
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themselves.
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It is moments like this that are quite humbling as you realize just how much of
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a moron you can be. Fortunately, from what Heads found during their search of
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Boaty McBoatface we had a better compromise for the Tails army. Aboard the ship
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are some cryostatis pods, so instead of needing to evacuate the excess clones we
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can just have them sleep in there until they are needed or we are in a better
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situation for having that many clones of myself around. After some murmuring it
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looked like the clones were find with agreeing to this plan. Before Heads guided
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the excess clones to cryostatis chamber I called forth for a meeting since we
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really needed to sort out this time cloning business to make sure something like
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this does not happen again. This meeting went on far longer than I would have
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expected since we are all the same person, but the previous threat of death via
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ejection into space and not being a good team player with other versions of
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myself was enough to already begin splintering off differences in the
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personalities of the clones (definitely something to think about later and
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probably keep me up at night). Eventually we all agreed to the seniority system
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where older clones will get to make the final decision on any disagreements
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along with creating an identification system using our books. The identification
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system works as follows:
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Since I am the original DeLorian, on the last page of my book I will right a
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zero. For each clone that follows, if they were created with a heads flip they
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will append another zero to their sequence and if they were created by a one
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they would instead append a one. Since we did not do this originally, each clone
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had to manually catch up by writing in their sequence from their respective
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memory. However, for all future versions they need only append to the end of
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their sequence since their book should be a copy of the version that created
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them. Then, to handle if additional sets of clones are created (e.g. if I
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decided to make additional clones from myself) we simply use the next pair of
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digits (e.g. in the previous example this would be 2 and 3 instead of 0 and 1).
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We were all fine with this until one of the Tails clones, who identified
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themself as "01019", asked about what we plan to do if one of us makes a 6th set
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of clones (the set after 8 and 9 are used). This had us stumped for a bit and we
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almost decided on a rule to never make a sixth pair of clones to avoid this
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(which left a few clones with a nervous look in their eye), until another Tails
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clone brought up something The Elder wrote in their original notes. Across the
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bottom of the page the following was written:
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01234567890abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwyzABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ-_
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At first I (or should I now say we?) throught this was just some weird way of
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testing out their penmanship on the page, but upon further inspection it looks
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like this would be the perfect solution for continuing on our clone code
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sequence past six sets. Now, we could make a full 32 sets of clones until we ran
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into a "roadblock" again. Since we all felt far more comfortable with the idea
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of having 32 as the hard cap on clones, we agreed to using this system moving
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forward and finalized our agreement by all writing down these rules into the
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last page of our books as our formal way of acknowledging our consensus. With
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that out of the way the extra clones were filed to the cryostatis chamber and
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order seemed to be restored at last. I met up with Tails (now also known as
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"01") to get their notes for the inventory of the ship to add to my notes. Once
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that was done Heads (now also knowns as "00") returned back from escorting the
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clones to complete their set of notes as well. It was after doing so and
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reviewing everything together that we came to a concerning revelation: we did
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not have enough food for all of the mouths we now had to feed. However, from my
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own search of the ship I found a hangar filled with lesser crafts and came up
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with a plan. I explained to Heads and Tails my plan of sending out some of the
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remaining Tails clones in one of the vessels to acquire more supplies and meet
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back with us at the rendevous point. They agreed with this plan so we tracked
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down "0100", "0110", "0101", and "0111" to do handle this mission for us. The
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four were not thrilled with the news, but they liked the idea better than us all
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starving to death so early into our life among the stars. With that we sent them
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off on "Mini Boaty McBoatface I" and the rest of the DeLorian time clone crew
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continued its journey to meet with our first clients as smugglers against the
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Federation.
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